Rock Band

I’m in my basement. The lights are low. The Cheetos are in the center of the coffee table, coupled with an array of half-pint Poland Spring bottles. I nod my head at the drummer, and with a cacophonous, distinctive rat-ta-tat, he acknowledges me back. Carefully, I arm my axe. The bassist follows suit. In the corner, an obfuscated figure emerges; the lead singer rises from the shadows, grabs the mic stand, and with one finger, he points towards the sky. It’s time. The Fab Faux a.k.a. Mind Explosion a.k.a. Alex Marcus and the Marquettes are ready to take this basement by storm. It’s time for some Rock Band.

Developed by Harmonix and released in November 2007 for the Xbox 360 and the Playstation 3, Rock Band is a video game in which the players, using different plastic peripherals like the aforementioned drums and bass, simulate the band experience by hitting the on-screen notes. When released, Rock Band was met with stellar sales and impeccable acclaim from both critics and the general public. But how did this rock simulator to end all rock simulators come to be?

The history of rhythm gaming runs fairly deep. Most consider the first modern game of the sort being NaNaOn-Sha’s PaRappa the Rapper (1996), a Playstation One game in which the player would repeat the rhythm sequences of in-game rapping animals. Soon after, the Japanese company Konami, another pioneer in obscure gaming, released beatmania, a DJ simulator, complete with a turntable. Peripheral rhythm gaming was born. This “revolution” would make way for games like my preteen pastime Dance Dance Revolution, the extremely popular Guitar Hero, my secret pre-Rock Band favorite Karaoke Revolution, and maraca simulator Samba de Amigo. With every new installment, these games became more, well, fun. In the spirit of that fine tradition, Rock Band is, arguably, one of the most exhilarating console games I’ve ever played.


Rock Band is, like an actual band, a communal activity. The ideal experience is when all four instruments are played, and each player is hopped up on energy drinks. The danger of Rock Band is the marathon session, when a band plays together for more than three hours. During these marathon sessions, tensions can run high, causing fights that lead to hurt feelings and/or face bleeding, all symptoms of Roxhaustion®. The real joy occurs when one’s band reaches new levels, acquiring virtual vehicles, like old vans or luxury airplanes.

The beauty of Rock Band is in its content. Who doesn’t want to lay down the slick bass line in "Are You Gonna Be My Girl" or wail their way through "Dead or Alive?" The most intriguing part of the content is its endless expansion. From the moment the game was released, downloadable content was available on both the 360 and the PS3, through their respective online services. And every week since, three songs, at the least, have been released from artists like the cultastic Greatful Dead and the teenage heart reapers the All-American Rejects. Now, That’s What I Call service.


Most people dream of being a rock star. And for years, it was just a dream. Now, with the development of Rock Band, every Joe, Sally, and Harish can live the dream. Even if it is in a Cheeto-covered basement.

Superman vs. Spiderman: The Real American Superhero?

The gamut of superheroes cherished by America is a vast, varied one. There are G.I. Josephs. There are so-called “captains of America”. There are human torches. There are even redheaded, curly haired, 80s TV stars. But if one were to push aside all of the lousy super heroes, all of the wash-ups and the copycats, the batmen and the wonder women, they would find the cream of the crop: Superman and Spiderman. These two masters of mental and physical stamina stay on top of their game more than any other. Each of them having lost their parents during their formative years, the truest sons of America were raised by Lady Liberty and Uncle Sam. Neck and neck, these elite superheroes have been fighting for decades for the top spot. It is now time to answer this age-old question: Who is the Real American Superhero?

Superman, was born Kal-El on the planet Krypton. His father and mother, along with the rest of his native planet, were killed when Krypton’s sun died; Kal-El was just an infant. Luckily, for the readers, Kal-El’s father sent him to Earth in an escape rocket, inadvertently creating one of the most important superheroes known to man. Superman’s rocket landed in Smallville, an average little town in America. He was adopted by two small town folks, Martha and Jonathan Kent, who, amazed by his superhuman strength, decided that they would adopt him and raise him as their own. Kal-El, who was renamed Clark Kent, made a fabulous transition from an otherworldly baby into a small town American citizen. Little by little, he would discover previously untapped powers, such as the ability to fly, and x-ray and laser vision. A classic example of the American immigrant, Superman was born of a foreign planet, but, like most immigrants, he was readily accepted into the American culture, because, in the end, no one is really from America. Superman is a historical artifact, the last remnants of a destroyed planet. If he were to immerse himself, alone, in his forgotten culture, Superman would surely go mad, and perhaps, with this in mind, he decided to abandon his homeland to protect his new planet of residence, never forgetting the tragedy that struck his infancy.

Emotionally, Superman is a rock, only slightly faltering when Lois Lane, his significant other, is in trouble. He is the model American man: muscular, tall, dark, and handsome. Created during the Great Depression, Superman originally started off facing local cronies, eventually moving on to bigger baddies, like Bizarro and Lex Luthor. He has embodied the resistance against fears that America has, and his job, a news reporter, is just another example of the services he provides to the people of Metropolis. In short, Superman is the perfect policeman, an ideal defender of the people.

Superman is written in such a fashion that he represents perfection, almost robotically; he is only slightly human in his choices. When Superman died (for a short time) in 1993 and was replaced by a robot (for an even shorter time), it said a great deal about his character. He was never really human; just a taskmaster, trying to create peace in a world that he is foreign to, using Clark Kent, a regular American man, as a mask that he has to put on to fit in. This next superhero is a regular American man, who uses an actual mask to protect his identity of a regular American citizen.

Peter Parker was born in Forest Hills, Queens, New York. His parents were both killed in an accident that varies from book to book. As a result of this teenage tragedy, he spent his late childhood, up until he was about fifteen, living with his Aunt May and Uncle Ben. During his teenage years, two things happened to Peter that would change his life forever: his uncle Ben was killed, and a radioactive spider bit Peter on the hand during a class trip. With his unconventional family situation, Peter represents the new, alternative American teenage boy. The real lesson that came out of the tragedy of Ben’s death, a reoccurring phrase in the Spiderman universe, was originally said by Uncle Ben: “With great power, comes great responsibility”, a symbol of the American burden. A part of being a citizen in America, a country full of freedom, is using the power responsibly that is given to you, in order to better the nation.

Spiderman represents the ability to stand up in the face of adversity. He is not passive, because he knows of his cosmic duty. His life was interrupted by this genetic disfiguration and, like an American with an opportunity, he seized it, using it for the greatest good. Peter is burdened by his powers, but would never stop protecting society, for this would mean betrayal of his uncle, and betrayal of his country.

Superman is iconic. He is perfect in every way. He is who we want to be. Spiderman is who we are. We are the lost boy in Queens, NY, who suffers death, stifles thoughts of revenge, of hatred. Superman has always been a man for the people, but he has never really been a man of the people. So, day after day, Peter Parker, a normal person, just like you and I, who could have lived a safe, normal life, swings through the urban jungles of our homeland from one arachnidan vine to the other, sacrificing himself for the lives of others. That is a true hero.

The Guild's on Strike...What to Do??

 

During my freshman year of high school, my paternal network television ban was lifted. After all of the pining for sitcoms, like Family Guy and The Simpsons, I was finally free. This tele-redemption led eventually to a life of Television Dependency, which culminated in an astonishing twelve serials a week that same year. The habit died down, and in my senior year, I was down to about five. But, on November 5th 2007, my living room luxuries abruptly ended.

On that fateful day, the Writers Guild of America went on strike. The strike was over DVD and “new media” (streaming, on demand, and other emerging technologies) residuals. It left millions of dedicated viewers, like yours truly, sobbing in their living room, helplessly clawing at the TV screen, screaming, “WHY MEDIA CONGLOMERATES, WHY!” Nevertheless, this feud in the entertainment industry caused a blackout throughout scripted American television. After January 2008, most shows which had already been recorded had finished airing. The future seemed bleak.

I suffered through a relentless onslaught of reality shows: 1 vs. 100, the revival of American Gladiator, Amnesia, Big Brother 9, The Biggest Loser, Dancing with the Stars, Deal or No Deal, The Moment of Truth, My Dad is Better Than Your Dad, Supernanny, Survivor, and Wife Swap. Stopped reading? I stopped watching. I decided that rather than suffer the agonies of viewing this Guantanamaic spectacle, I would rip off my Huggies, stop listening to the Big Five (CBS, NBC, FOX, ABC, CW), and start entertaining myself in other ways.

I went to the Internet. Instead of watching middle-aged British nannies yell at American children, I decided to read Digg. Digg.com is an intriguing news website that gets its main-page articles according to how much the Digg community likes it,. The average Digg user is an 18 to 24 year old liberal geek atheist who is vehemently against Scientology, strongly for freedom of information, and other things, like the little man. The average Digg user hates conservative media, including FOX and the MPAA, but loves Apple. Most importantly, the average Digg user loves interesting facts about obscure subjects. With all of that in mind, one can get a good idea of the kind of content that is on Digg.

My “boob tube” became YouTube. From here, there, and everywhere, I was sent to the mystical corners of the video-streaming site, a magical land where everyone can make it big and word of mouth is king. From music videos by mainstream and underground musicians, to comedic shorts and clips of crazy real life events, like a break-dancer kicking a toddler in a face, you name it: YouTube has it. But I couldn’t just live without television.

Meanwhile, in the Home of the Brave, television continued to be riddled with poisonous reality TV. And, frankly, if I wanted to face reality, I wouldn’t be watching TV. So I swam across the pond, to the United Kingdom’s Channel 4, where I set my sights on Skins, a British teen drama. Over a whirlwind winter break, I watched all nine episodes and then proceeded to watch minisodes on the Skins website in the interim between winter break and the premiere of the second “series”, the British term for season.

On February 10th, the day before Skins series two premiered, the WGA ended their strike, reaching a settlement with the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers, the AMPTP. After all the protests, all of the Chuck-less Monday nights, Hollywood was at peace. The AMPTP, clamoring to make a buck, rushed production on primetime’s most successful shows, including Gossip Girl and Lost. My shows would be coming back.

But through all of this television deprivation, I’ve learned the joys of the Internet as a form of entertainment. It is definitely a quirky place to entertain oneself, but a viable method, still. And to all of those faithful fans whose shows haven’t come back yet, keep your head up, and your eyes on the computer screen. The future is wild.